Welcome Guest [Log In] [Register]
Welcome to bcfcforum.co.uk. We hope you enjoy your visit.


You're currently viewing our forum as a guest. This means you are limited to certain areas of the board and there are some features you can't use. If you join our community, you'll be able to access member-only sections, and use many member-only features such as customizing your profile, sending personal messages, and voting in polls. Registration is simple, fast, and completely free.


Join our community!


If you're already a member please log in to your account to access all of our features:

Username:   Password:
Add Reply
Harold
Topic Started: Dec 14 2010, 01:46 PM (344 Views)
fatlad
Malcom Page
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
Harold is 95 and lives in a Senior Citizen Home.

Every night after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the Centre to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life.

One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have passed. After a short lull in their conversation, Harold turns to Mildred and asks, 'Do you know what I miss most of all?'

She asks, 'What?'

'Sex!!' he replies,

Mildred exclaims, 'Why you old fart. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!'

'I know,' Harold says, 'but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while.'

Well, I can oblige,' says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's manhood.
Then one night Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he was O.K. She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident, who was holding Harold's manhood!

Furious, Mildred yelled, 'You two-timing son of a A Female dog! What does Ethel have that I don't have?'

Old Harold smiled happily and replied, 'Parkinson's.'
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
tarrantini
Member Avatar
Bob Hatton
[ *  *  *  * ]
fatlad
Dec 14 2010, 01:46 PM
Harold is 95 and lives in a Senior Citizen Home.

Every night after dinner, Harold goes to a secluded garden behind the Centre to sit and ponder his accomplishments and long life.

One evening, Mildred, age 87, wanders into the garden. They begin to chat and before they know it, several hours have passed. After a short lull in their conversation, Harold turns to Mildred and asks, 'Do you know what I miss most of all?'

She asks, 'What?'

'Sex!!' he replies,

Mildred exclaims, 'Why you old fart. You couldn't get it up if I held a gun to your head!'

'I know,' Harold says, 'but it would be nice if a woman could just hold it for a while.'

Well, I can oblige,' says Mildred, who unzips his trousers, removes his manhood and proceeds to hold it. Afterward, they agree to meet secretly each night in the garden where they would sit and talk and Mildred would hold Harold's manhood.
Then one night Harold didn't show up at their usual meeting place. Alarmed, Mildred decided to find Harold and make sure he was O.K. She walked around the Senior Citizen Home where she found him sitting by the pool with Ethel, another female resident, who was holding Harold's manhood!

Furious, Mildred yelled, 'You two-timing son of a A Female dog! What does Ethel have that I don't have?'

Old Harold smiled happily and replied, 'Parkinson's.'

:LMAO: :applause:

Cant wait to tell dad
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
dr.nick
Member Avatar
Trevor Francis
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
:LMAO:

I see you've bought a new joke book Jay. :D
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
treetop
Member Avatar
Alex Govan
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
It's not new to me fats I'm sure I put this on here some time back.
Still funny though.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
bluenosebryan
Member Avatar
Geoff Horsfield
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
:applause:
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
ESONEULB
Member Avatar
Bluenose Ad Vitam = Bluenose For Life
[ *  *  *  *  *  *  * ]
:LOL: :LOL: :LOL:
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
maulley54
Mikael Forssell
[ *  *  *  *  * ]
great joke, but have to say treetop got there first.
Offline Profile Quote Post Goto Top
 
1 user reading this topic (1 Guest and 0 Anonymous)
« Previous Topic · General Chat · Next Topic »
Add Reply

Forum Design by Hirsty.